Movies by Mail

I don’t care what company you use; this service is an absolute necessity in any weekwaster’s life.

Movies through the mail. They send about 6 hours worth of do-nothing directly to your house, and all you have to do is open the door (not even that if you have a mailslot).

Catch up on old movies. Build your references. Have you ever been curious about any movie or TV show ever? Seriously, any movie. Even that one where William Shatner speaks Esperanto. Well now, you’ve prepaid to rent it, so you might as well throw it in the queue. I did.

You can stagger them so that you always have something to watch. I get about three movies at a time, which works well for me, but you can get up to 8 at a time. Glorious.

Then there’s the instant watch option. And that’s really what shines through, here. Thousands of utterly worthless movies available to watch at any point during the day. Any point. Utterly worthless. Stop typing that letter to Grandma; it’s time to watch American Pie 8. Postpone that blog post; watch something inexplicably starring Nicolas Cage as a near-elderly action hero.

The instant movies feature shatters the last barrier between the user and pure, unadulterated sloth — having to get up and actually put the DVD in the tray. I swear, the first helper cyborgs will be used only for answering the door, loading DVDs, and mailing them back. I know I’d buy one.


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