Compound procrastination

This is a trick for our advanced students. I warn you, what I’m about to teach you should not be undertaken lightly, so proceed with caution.

If regular procrastination is losing its kick, I’m here to tell you that you can actually procrastinate while you procrastinate. It’s a neat technique I call compound procrastination and I try to use it whenever possible. It’ll really get your time-wasting on the fast track. Here’s a few examples of compound procrastination in action:

Say you have to do something, but you’d much rather be watching a movie. So go ahead and get a movie ready. After you put the DVD in the player, and sit down on the couch, but before you switch the TV to the DVD input, think about what you could be missing on TV. Then, it’s just a matter of deciding to flip around the channels to make sure you’re not missing anything good, and voila! You’ve successfully put-off watching your movie (which itself is just you putting-off something else) until after you’ve watched your TV programs. Sweet move, huh?

Let’s try another. You’re trying not to write a blog post. You figure a good way to not do that is to get something to eat. But you kind of want to play a video game, and you may not have time later tonight (Who are we kidding? You’ve got all the time in the world). Fret not! You can do all of these things in layers, built upon each other like a big, lazy onion. Soon enough, you’ll be playing your video games, which is putting-off eating, which in turn is putting-off blog posting, which is just putting-off doing something meaningful with your life! Blammo!

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2 Responses to “Compound procrastination”

  1. A good way of doing the movie thing is to also have a handy lap cat. Get the movie out, sit down in the comfortable chair and have the cat get in the lap. You don’t want to disturb the cat, so you have an excellent excuse to not watch the movie (or get a drink, or eat, or exercise, or anything else). Great procrastination multiplier.

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